Look, I’m not even going to waste your time explaining why this is the scariest film of all time — if you don’t know, I won’t ruin your life, so just forget it. But for those of you who know, let’s get into it—

Return to Oz. Ho. Ly. SHIT.

Do you know what terror looks like? It looks like THIS FILM.

Aw man, it was a terrible upbringing. I saw THIS movie before I even HEARD of “The Wizard of Oz.” I swear to God. I thought “Wizard to Oz” was a sequel to relieve children’s minds after this assault. I had no idea.

Every time I heard a reference to a yellow brick road, a witch, Kansas, midgets, ANYTHING… it would remind me if this horrific tail.

TWO WORDS:

The Wheelers.

Alright, I’m too drunk to get into this now, but tomorrow I’m going to knock your balls off.

Posted 11th February, 2012