So I’m back home in Upstate New York for the holidays. I spent 18 years of my life here, which I had previously convinced myself were “miserable years.” But after spending 6 ABSOLUTELY ABYSMAL years in Los Angeles, I’m not so sure…

Anyway, I’m a Halloween enthusiast. And I saved this memento from Halloween ‘02… the Smurfs. Oh, the Smurfs, you say? That’s not very original! In fact, you probably know a chap or two who’ve painted themselves blue along with some other nitwits from Alpha Beta Doucha or whatever, and claimed to be a Smurfs for Halloween.

Those people can kiss my ass. You can’t just paint yourself blue and call yourself a Smurf. You can paint yourself blue and call yourself a dickhole, but not a Smurf. You see, me and my friends don’t cut corners for Halloween. We’re fuckin’ champs. And goddammit, we’re good at paper mache… 

This motherfucker has held up. And I plan on saving it at my mom’s house until I’m long in the grave.

God bless Halloween. And HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO YOU ALL!!!!

Posted 18th December, 2011