December 2011
25 posts
1 tag
SHIT YEAH COME TO THIS
Hey guys and gals that live in New York, for ONE NIGHT ONLY I am hosting an improv show on Thursday the 5th at the Triple Crown Ale House!
I cannot do improv. I’m scared of it. But you know who’s not? shiraselko! And she will be there!
http://www.facebook.com/events/117341061716966/
STUPID VEGAN LOGIC
One time this nitwit vegan chick tried to spoon-feed me her stupid vegan propaganda that was based around the following argument: humans are the only species that knowingly drink the milk of another species, and therefore it is “unnatural.”
Well let’s think about that for a second, Sally Shallots. Did you ever stop to consider that we’re the only species drinking another...
TWITTERERERERS THAT I LIKED IN 2011
This is in no way meant to undercut @tracy_marq’s amazing list, or even compliment it. These are just some folks that I personally liked (under 20K) that weren’t on hers. Hell, I don’t care if you follow these people or not. Who gives a shit?
1.) @fleshcake: Checking out some of these Target paintings in case I ever move into a butt.
*on a side note, @fleshcake is the King of...
VEGAS TWEETUP 2011
I miss my friends from the Vegas tweetup back in… When was that? May? June? I forget. Guys like — and I don’t use Tumblr that much, so I don’t know how to tag people or whatever — Fredasaurusrex, Matt Tice, cynicaljess, ongoingbs, theblessmess, Im_Tricia, Jusky, etc.
Bunch of pricks in real life. All of them.
SUCCESSFUL DAD MEME
So I’m very happy that I inspired at least a handful of people to post pictures of their Dads on Tumblr. I think all of you are awesome. At the very least, it made me happy. And hey, admit it: it’s better than the stupid “sexy shoulders” or “bare feet” or “tar & feathered assholes” memes that usually happen here.
But now it’s going to get...
DAD MEME!
I’m going to try to start a meme. Let’s all post pictures of our dads for absolutely no reason.
SEVERE INTESTINAL DISTRESS
I don’t understand people who give up on a restaurant just because they “got sick.” I think these people are weak.
My philosophy is, if it tasted good going down, then anything abnormal that happens after that is my fault. Because look, your tastebuds and your colon aren’t always going to get along. Sometimes they quarrel like siblings. So if my stomach is deciding to be...
12 DAYS OF MADNESS
“The 12 Days of Christmas” is pure lunacy. I don’t even know where to begin.
Nevermind the fact that Christmas doesn’t actually unfold over 12 days. I mean, sure, 12 days of Christmas, that’s cute. It’s a nice thought, isn’t it? Sounds like a lot of fun. I think they even did that in medieval times or something.
But it’s clear to me that this...
HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!
So I’m back home in Upstate New York for the holidays. I spent 18 years of my life here, which I had previously convinced myself were “miserable years.” But after spending 6 ABSOLUTELY ABYSMAL years in Los Angeles, I’m not so sure…
Anyway, I’m a Halloween enthusiast. And I saved this memento from Halloween ‘02… the Smurfs. Oh, the Smurfs, you say?...
OH SHIT CHECK IT OUT
My friend gave me this original magazine from 1975 with a CitiCar on the cover! COOLEST GIFT EVER.
UNFOLLOWING ON TWITTER
Look man, here’s the thing. I’ve been a little more liberal about unfollowing people on Twitter lately. Some people are just repetitive and predictable and their act is old, and my timeline is crowded. It’s NOTHING personal at all. I don’t DISLIKE these people as human beings. Twitter just gets boring with time, and I wind up not spending as much time on it, so I...
emppalp-deactivated20120423 asked: You know the T-Rex Paddock? Well at first it has a solid ground but later on it disappears. It is a glaring error within the film but it is still a great film overall. Isn't that like loving a woman? Despite major flaws you still love the total package? Discuss.
I'M POSTING NUDITY I'M SORRY
…But this is just too good. @ElmaBeez on Twitter sent this to me. I mean, I have naked women in my ComutaCar all the time, it just never occurred to me to take a picture of it. But now I kinda want to one-up it. Who’s in?!
CHRISTMAS CHEER
I received my first (and probably only) Christmas card of the year from @shiraselko yesterday! I’d show you what’s written inside, but it’s blank. I don’t understand that woman. But I appreciate the gesture!
NAVY BLUE SUCKS
Navy blue should just be called “almost black.”
FACTITIOUS FRIDAY
I’m so broke I’ve been siphoning my roommate’s shampoo.
THRYLLGASM
So we got this awesome production company dripping hot saliva all over the pavement for “Murder Squad” as a half-hour sitcom! We’re working on a formal pitch, which can only mean I will be wearing one of the 62 costumes I own. Love it or hate it, these people are going to REMEMBER this pitch for the rest of their lives.
If you haven’t watched Murder Squad, please do! Here...
GREEN HORSESHIT
I need to talk about this thing for a minute.
I don’t need to talk about the Green Lantern movie itself, everyone knows it’s crap. My beef is with the DVD case. Take a gander at that quote on the bottom. “ACTION-PACKED!” Wow, really? Are we still putting this stupid quote on DVD cases? Has “ACTION-PACKED” really lured anybody into a theater to see a movie since maybe like RKO Pictures did it in...